Now I’m “That Mom.” The mom of the kid you don’t want in your classroom because her mom is That Mom.
Kiddo#2 told us that in the hallway outside her classroom, there’s a sign that says “We Are Thankful For.” I asked what they were thankful for, and she told me they hadn’t put anything on the bulletin board yet.
I said, “I bet in a week or so, you’ll have to do a project about something you’re thankful for.”
It’s a public school, if you’re wondering, so the kids can’t be thankful to God. But at the same time, they’re not really expected to be thankful to anyone else, either. They’re just supposed to be thankful in isolation. It makes no sense: Thankful is supposed to have an object; glad doesn’t. Grief needs an object; depression by definiton doesn’t. They’ve turned a directed emotion into nondirected, but that’s another blog entry.
I said to Kiddo#2, “Most of the kids are going to say that they’re thankful for their families, or for their pets, or something like that. You should choose something weird.”
She said, “Like what?”
I said, “You could be thankful for salt shakers.”
My Patient Husband said, “Traffic lights.”
I said, “Indoor plumbing and central heating.”
We came up with a lovely list of things to be thankful for that would be unique on that board of “We Thank Something For The Following Good Things:”
- The internal combustion engine
- The number ten
- The transistor
- The planet Jupiter
You get the point. All good things, and yet all under-appreciated in the grand scheme of things as judged by grammar-school bulletin boards.
I have no idea what she’ll actually pick for her thankfulness. But if she takes my advice, the teacher herself will have something to be thankful for at the end of the school year. At least, she will until she looks up one September to find Kiddo#3 in her class.
More subversion tomorrow.