Overthinking “If you give a mouse a cookie”

The two year old recently discovered “If You Give A Mouse A Cookie,” about an hour after I cleaned under the bed and rediscovered it myself. It’s an awesome little book and I enjoy it, especially the realism in the drawings.

If you haven’t read it, even if you don’t have kids, go look it up. (It’s a great gift for toddlers; I’m less enthusiastic about the sequels.) The book follows the course of events after a boy gives a mouse a cookie (we have a title!) and the mouse asks for a glass of milk, then a napkin, then a straw. Then he wants to look in the mirror to make sure he doesn’t have a milk-mustache and notices his hair needs a trim. Followed by a haircut and all sorts of other hijinx. The boy ends the day exhausted.

I thought angelward, “I bet that’s how you guys feel.” I guess the angels were too polite to answer.

Of course, my Patient Husband and I are geeks, so we can’t just leave it alone. After reading it three hundred and twelve times, we kind of made up our own.

I’ll start sometimes with “If you read a boy a book, he’ll probably ask you to read it to him again. When you read it to him again, he’ll probably ask you to read it to him again. So you’ll read it to him again, and then he’ll ask you to read it to him again.”

That’s a bit more boring than the real book, of course, but it’s an appropriate slice of life around these parts.

But sometimes my Patient Husband and I will get a little bit more geeky.

If you give a louse a Wookie, he’ll probably swindle a space ship out of his best friend to go with it.

He’ll want to go into the smuggling business.

While he’s smuggling spices, he’ll probably try to double-cross Jabba The Hutt.

When he’s done double-crossing Jabba, he’ll need to hole up somewhere for a while to save his life, so he’ll go hide at Mos Eisley. He’ll probably end up in a bar.

Hiding out in a bar will mean he meets a couple of Jedi–

You get the point. We’re just a little weird around these parts. My kids don’t understand.  But it’s okay.

Fighting the Empire will remind him that he needs…a space ship.

And chances are, if he gets a space ship, he’s going to want a Wookie to go with it.

*sigh*  I’m off to go read a book for the 313th time. Wish me luck.


About philangelus

Mom, freelance writer, novelist, angelphile, Catholic, know-it-all.
This entry was posted in kiddos, writing. Bookmark the permalink.

5 Responses to Overthinking “If you give a mouse a cookie”

  1. Snicker! You two are a match made in heaven!

    Kids like the same things over and over ’cause they’re not jaded like us! I think “If You Give a Cat a Cupcake” is still under my daughter’s bed. I’ll let the dust bunnies read it.

    • philangelus says:

      We’re definitely a match made in Heaven. I’m not sure anyone else could put up my geekery, although my Patient Husband would have been a great Husband no matter whom he’d married (even if she’d ended up his Confused Wife.)

  2. Lydia Kang says:

    That is so funny! Yeah, the “If you read a book” one is soooo true.

    I think you may need to publish the “If you give a louse a Wookie”.

    • philangelus says:

      Yeah, I’m sure two very powerful, very rich copyright holders wouldn’t sue me for copyright infringement, trademark infringement, fraud, libel, ambidexterity, or anything else their attorneys thought they could make stick. 🙂

  3. They’d just be jealous that they didn’t think of it themselves. I thought it was hysterical 🙂

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